Three Meditations

Our school day begins and ends with meditation, and lunch is bracketed by first moment of silence and afterwards a brief meditation. Each has a very different quality. They have evolved.

Morning begins with a brief talk and a twenty minute sit, in which some students concentrate on their martial arts forms and others focus on a basic breathing meditation. Here they are invited to notice what moods, thoughts, sensations, and so on they are starting the school day with.

The afternoon meditation is quite different- they tend to rather tumble into the meditation room, noisy and relaxed. Here they are asked to master a change of state, from the bustle of lunch to some quiet and centered breathing for just a few minutes. It is a change to set the tone for the rest of the day.

At the end of the day, a student usually leads a 5 or ten minute sitting. Here students are left to their own ability to settle in and let the school day go.

Abstract of the Day

MATERIALISM AND DIMINISHED WELL-BEING: EXPERIENTIAL AVOIDANCE AS A MEDIATING MECHANISM

Todd B Kashdan, William E Breen. Journal of Social and Clinical Psychology.New York: May 2007. Vol. 26, Iss. 5; pg. 521, 19 pgs

Abstract (Summary)

Being preoccupied with the pursuit of money, wealth, and material possessions arguably fails as a strategy to increase pleasure and meaning in life. However, little is known about the mechanisms that explain the inverse relation between materialism and well-being. The current study tested the hypothesis that experiential avoidance mediates associations between materialistic values and diminished emotional well-being, meaning in life, self-determination, and gratitude. Results indicated that people with stronger materialistic values reported more negative emotions and less relatedness, autonomy, competence, gratitude, and meaning in life. As expected, experiential avoidance fully mediated associations between materialistic values and each dimension of well-being. Emotional disturbances such as social anxiety and depressive symptoms failed to account for these findings after accounting for shared variance with experiential avoidance. The results are discussed in the context of alternative, more fulfilling routes to well-being. [PUBLICATION ABSTRACT]

Yesterday's Talk

If you are looking at problem, picture this: A mountain, a river, and your practice. The mountain is the thing you cannot affect or change, the river a force either cresting or falling. When the river is fast and rising, one doesn't cross it, one waits. When the river is becoming shallow, one crosses. There is a proper time to wait and a proper time to cross.

Meanwhile, the one thing we can always count on is our practice: sitting meditation, compassion towards ourselves and others, and focused work.

Why Bother?

Election Day poses a problem that most voters and (especially) non-voters miss: why does anyone vote at all? Or more specifically, why does an individual vote? A single vote is a simple summation of some very complex processes, like any observable behavior. But at its heart is a paradox. And this can be said about any human endeavor. The paradox of voting is that one vote really amounts to almost nothing, and yet it is also much more than a ritual act of democracy. Lurking in the heart of every voter is this: what if I didn't vote and no one else did either?

Why bother? In this morning's meditation I asked this of the students. Why come to school on time? Why be kind to others? Why do your work well? At our school, we have few punishments or "consequences" (a term I am never comfortable with). We continually nudge a student's acts and words back onto them. Punishment usually only distracts from the serious grappling with one's responsibility. So why bother trying hard at all... it seems so much easier not to.

But, alas, it is not easier. Slowly one's awareness broadens, and along with it, one's conception of self-interest. But within this process- however long it takes- a person wrestles with the question. Or they avoid it. But at some point it becomes clear- in this school- that it is all about relationships. Why bother? The answer is not "because I have relationships". The answer lay within each of our particular web of relationships: to others, ourselves, our ambitions, and our desires.

No one can answer this question but the individual alone. The best teacher can't make a student work or give a damn. But the trust that must be the basis of a relationship- any relationship- is based on previous experiences and our deep inclinations as humans to have relationships. This is what the teacher and student steps into. The student must become conscious of all this. The teacher must manage the trust.

Trust is faith. There is every reason in the world to be nihilistic and not bother much at all. Yet we keep on bothering, most of us, every day. Those of us who can honestly ask the question every day are the best among us.